Showing posts with label NBA. Show all posts
Showing posts with label NBA. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

April Fools!

Considering it is April 1st, we here at Muck My Blog have put together a countdown looking at the top 10 Sports Jokes and Gimmicks of All-Time. Enjoy


10. Mark Cuban Goes Nuts
Number 10 on our countdown actually happened on April Fools Days on 2003. Enigmatic Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban got into a physical fight with a phony game official during a game against the New Orleans Hornets. With Cuban's past of throwing verbal jabs at the referees and receiving fines, he made this outburst easily believable. However, when the dust settled, Cuban and the ref broke into laughs with several people more in shock than with smiles. Nonetheless, a solid joke. Mark Cuban has been fined over a million dollars by the National Basketball Association. That, is no joke.


9. Chad Johnson Legally Changes his Name

Speaking of fines, the Cincinnati Bengals receiver formerly known as Chad Johnson was fined $5,000 for wearing a jersey with the last name "Ocho Cinco" on the back, as opposed to C. Johnson. Of course, Ocho Cinco is Johnson, or Ocho's Cinco's number in spanish. Well, if the National Football League would not allow him to wear Ocho Cinco on the back of his jersey, why not just legally change your last name? That's exactly what Ocho Cinco did in August of 2008. However, forgetting he had a financial obligation with Reebok, Ocho Cinco must remain to wear C.Johnson on the back of his jersey. Can always count on Johnson, or Ocho Cinco, or whatever, for a good laugh.

8. Peter Worrell Throws Teammate Under the Bus
Having already spent 10 days in prison for a DUI in 2002, former Florida Panthers forward Peter Worrell had to think fast when caught drunk behind the wheel 2.5 years later. Worrell identified himself as Andreas Lilja, who was also a member of the Panthers at the same time. Unfortunately for Peter, Lilja, of Swedish descent, white, and standing at 6'3, did not quite resemble the 6'7, black, French Canadian Worrell. Good try though Peter, hopefully you don't pass these types of morals to the players on the Florida Junior Panthers, the team you help coach.



7. Brett Favre to the American Hockey League?


In July of 2008, the Iowa Stars of the AHL switched from being the Dallas Stars affiliate to becoming the Anaheim Ducks affiliate. The Iowa Stars became the Iowa Chops. I haven't had much experience with "Iowa Chops," but there is something disturbing about that name. Nonetheless, one of the first orders of business of the Chops was to offer NFL free agent quarterback Brett Favre a contract with the team. Chops President Steve Nitzel said "what's not to like about that?" Maybe the fact that Brett Favre is not a hockey player? Nice try Iowa, how is corn?


6. Disco Demolition Night

In July of 1979, the Chicago White Sox management team came up with an idea to blow up several thousand disco records in the middle of the field between games of a double-header between the White Sox and Detroit Tigers. Comiskey Park was expecting an extra 5,000 fans in the stands for the game as a decent promotion. When 75,000 people showed up, absolute mayhem occured. Thousands of people rushed the field, and with bombs going over and small fires, the diamond was in no condition for the second game. It was likely the easiest victory in Detroit Tigers history as they won by forefeit. Interesting fact: Green Mile actor Michael Clarke Duncan was one of the first 100 on the field. "That's John Coffey ma'am...like the drink, except spelt dif'rently"

5. "I Have Never Used Steroids. Period."

Those were the words of former Baltimore Orioles hitter and former future Hall of Famer, Rafael Palmeiro when he was testifying against his usuage of steroids in his career. Less than six months later Palmeiro was handed the mandatory ten game suspension by Major League Baseball after testing positive for banned substance stanozolol. I don't know who Raffy was trying to fool, and even though fellow slugger Mark McGwire looked like an absolute knob refusing to speak to Congress, at least he doesn't have to watch himself pointing into the faces of Congress denying something he clearly did.



4. Punch Imlach drafts a fake player


It was no secret that Buffalo Sabres General Manager Punch Imlach was a little frustrated by the time the 11th round of the 1974 NHL Entry Draft came around. Without hesistation, Imlach drafted Taro Tsujimoto of the Japanese Hockey League's Tokyo Katanas. The problem with this selection was that Taro Tsujimoto did not exist. Sure, Imlach may have benefitted from taking, say Dave Lumley, who went several picks later to the Montreal Canadiens and amassed 98 goals in his decent career, but the old Buffalo Auditorium would never have had the "We Want Taro" chants that united the Sabres faithful during tough times.


3. Now Batting For the Yankees....


Billy Crystal, number 60. It's official, the New York Yankees can buy anyone. They did just that by signing the former City Slicker and Yankee Superfan to a one-day contract to play in a preseason game against the Pittsburgh Pirates in 2008. To no one's surprise, Crystal went down swinging, but managed to foul off a pitch in his first and last at-bat. I guess it was to honour Crystal for his lifelong devotion to the Bronx Bombers, including his film 61*. Being a Toronto Maple Leaf fan myself, I hope Mike Myers is never found within 250 feet of the Leafs locker room after his award winning film (Razzie for worst picture, worst actor) "The Love Guru."




2. Manute Bol...on Ice

Manute Bol holds the distinction of being not only the tallest NBA player in history, but also the only player in NBA history to block more shots than he has made baskets. I guess that's the advantage of being 7'7 Sudanese basketball player. What 7'7 Sudanese basketball players don't do, is play hockey. However, Bol laced them up for the Indianapolis Ice of the Central Hockey League in 2002. Bol sat on the bench for most of the first period, then left to sign autographs for fans. Not sure how relevant this moment is in sports history, but seeing that guy in hockey equipment was definitely a site to see, and hey, why not try to increase the popularity in Indiana, there's nothing else exciting there.



1. Rosie Ruiz Fools Everyone

Rosie Ruiz was the female winner of the 1980 Boston Marathon. However, she was later stripped of her title when race officials discovered she actually didn't run the race. She registered for the race. Okay good, step one, no problem. She then skipped out on the race, rested up, and hopped on the track for the home stretch. How could they let her qualify? Well, during the New York Marathon, she hopped on a subway, faked an injury near the end, and was deemed qualified for the Boston Marathon. Officials were skeptical when ruiz finished the race 25 minutes ahead of her New York Marathon time, and was not even fatigued from the 26.2 mile race. Ruiz claims she just had a lot of energy that day. Ruiz's fifteen minutes of fame were soon over and her medal was handed over. Gotta give her credit though, she pulled a fast one on EVERYONE, and that is the true meaning of April Fool's Day.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

World's Best Arm Candy

Muck My Blog's
TOP 10 HOTTEST PROFESSIONAL ATHLETE'S ARM CANDY

We here at Muck My Blog thought we have been a little bias as of late, just focussing on the male side of the spectrum so we thought we would try and change things up a little bit... Pfttt who am I trying to kid, we figured we would go behind closed doors and show you what the life of a professional athlete is really all about - Trophy Wives, Arm Candy, Models, Actresses, Singers/Songwriters, and those who are just filthy rich (some in more ways than one). Without any further adieu here is our list of the Top 10 Hottest Professional Athlete's Arm Candy.

NUMBER 10
Kim Kardashian (Boyfriend Reggie Bush, New Orleans Saints Running Back) 
- There's no money shortage in this relationship, maybe just a shortage on brains. Keep doing what your doing Reggie!

NUMBER 9
Gisele Bundchen (Husband Tom Brady, New England Patriots Quarterback)
- Any of this guy's past 3 girlfriends could have made the list, but we had to pick just one.

NUMBER 8
Elisha Cuthbert (Boyfriend Dion Phaneuf, Calgary Flames Defenseman)
- This Girl Next Door is also better known to hockey fans as "The Sloppy Seconds", but HEY she's Canadian!

NUMBER 7
Jessica Simpson (Boyfriend Tony Romo, Dallas Cowboys Quarterback)
- The bearer of the Jessica Jinx, also known as Yoko Romo.

NUMBER 6
Elin Nordegren (Husband Tiger Woods, World's #1 Ranked Professional Golfer)
- Come on now, he's Tiger Woods!

NUMBER 5
Cheryl Tweedy (Husband Ashley Cole, Chelsea/English National Football Team Left Back)
- Apparently Tweedy has had 21 UK Top 10 singles as a vocalist, but we have our own suggestion. How about you just focus on looking like this at all times? Okay, sounds good.

NUMBER 4
Eva Longoria (Husband Tony Parker, San Antonio Spurs Point Guard)
-Parker has never led the NBA in steals, but we feel as though the steal he had here on this Desperate Housewife is way more important than any he could have recorded on the court. But then again he does have 3 NBA Titles and a Finals MVP to his name. Touché Tony.

NUMBER 3
Carrie Underwood (Boyfriend Mike Fisher, Ottawa Senators Forward)
- Season 4 American Idol winner seemed a little camera shy when spotted at an Ottawa Senators home game last month. It's no wonder "The Best Eyes in Hockey" were able to pick this one out of a crowd.

NUMBER 2
Willa Ford (Husband Mike Modano, Dallas Stars Forward)
- Begs the question who is actually better looking in this relationship, her or husband Mikey Mo? Also, who spends more time in the shower, or their hair in the morning.

NUMBER 1
1. Gena Lee Nolin (Husband Cale Hulse, Unrestricted Free Agent Defenseman)
- Former Barker's Beauty and Baywatch Babe, pretty good for a guy most people have probably never heard of. I don't see this guy returning to the NHL anytime soon, and with a wife like this at home why would he?

HONORABLE MENTION
  • Victoria Beckham (Husband David Beckham, AC Milan/English National Football Team Midfielder)
  • Hilary Duff (Boyfriend Mike Comrie, Ottawa Senators Forward)
  • Rachel Hunter (Fiance Jarrett Stoll, Los Angeles Kings Forward) *"The Other Sloppy Seconds"
  • Rena Mero (Husband Brock Lesnar, UFC Heavyweight Champion) *She's Sable to all you WWE fans.
  • Jennifer Walcott (Fiance Adam Archuleta, Free Agent Linebacker/Safety)
  • Anna Benson (Husband Kris Benson, Texas Rangers Pitcher)
  • Ingrid Vandebosche (Husband Jeff Gordon, NASCAR Driver)
  • Aleka Kamila (Husband Peja Stojakovic, New Orleans Hornets Small Forward)
  • Vanessa Bryant (Husband Kobe Bryant, Los Angeles Lakers Shooting Guard)
  • Jenna Jameson (Boyfriend Tito Ortiz, MMA Fighter)
  • Jamie Kotsay (Husband Mark Kotsay, Boston Red Sox Outfielder/First Baseman)
  • Abigail Clancy (Boyfriend Peter Crouch, Portsmouth/English National Football Team Striker)
  • Carmella Garcia (Husband Jeff Garcia, Free Agent Quarterback) *And there was a rumor at one point that Garcia might be gay? Well if he is, this is a pretty good cover.

DAMNNNNNNNNNNNN!

Monday, March 30, 2009

A Look Ahead

Just to give you a little taste of what's ahead in the World of Sports in the coming month...

The Conclusion of March Madness (from Ford Field in Detroit, Michigan)
Final Four - Saturday April 4th
National Championship - Monday April 6th

Remaining Teams:
  • [South Champions] 1 University of North Carolina vs. [East Champions] 3 Villanova
  • [West Champions] 1 University of Conneticuit vs. [Midwest Champions] 2 Michigan State

Wrestlemania XXV (from the Reliant Stadium in Houston, Texas)
Sunday April 5th

The 25th Anniversary of Wrestlemania has a star-studded lineup including:
  • WWE Championship Match - Triple H vs. Randy Orton
  • World Heavyweight Championship Match - Edge vs. John Cena vs. The Big Show
  • Shawn Michaels vs. The Undertaker
  • Intercontinental Championship - JBL vs. Rey Mysterio
  • Extreme Rules Match - Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy
  • Money in the Bank Ladder Match (Kane, CM Punk, Christian, Kofi Kingston, MVP, Shelton Benjamin, Mark Henry, Finley)
  • Chris Jericho vs. WWE Legends (Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat, Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka, "Rowdy" Roddy Piper)
  • WWE Tag Team Championship Lumberjack Match  [Unification Match]  - WWE Tag Team Champions (Carlito & Primo) vs. World Tag Team Champions (The Miz & John Morrison)
  • 25-Diva Battle Royal

The Masters Tournament (Augusta National Golf Club in Augusta, Georgia)
April 9th-12th

Featured players:
  • Tiger Woods, Phil Mickelson, Sergio Garcia, Geoff Ogilvy, Padraig Harrington, Vijay Singh, Robert Karlsson, Camilo Villegas, Kenny Perry, Henrik Stenson, among others 
  • CANADIANS Mike Weir & Stephen Ames

NHL Draft Lottery
Tuesday April 14th

Top 5 Ranked players:
1. John Tavares - London Kinghts (OHL)
2. Victor Hedman - Modo (Sweden)
3. Matt Duchene - Brampton Battalion (OHL)
4. Evander Kane - Vancouver Giants (WHL)
5. Brayden Schenn - Brandon Wheat Kings (WHL)

NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs
begin Wednesday April 15th

NBA Playoffs
begin Saturday April 18th

NFL Draft (from Radio City Music Hall in New York City)
April 25th-26th

Top 5 Ranked players:
1. Aaron Curry - Wake Forest
2. Michael Crabtree - Texas Tech
3. Jason Smith - Baylor
4. Brian Orakpo - Texas
5. Eugene Monroe - Virginia

KEEP YOUR ASSES GLUED TO THE COUCH AND YOUR EYES GLUED TO YOUR TV SETS!

League Serves Up Another to Mavericks Owner Cuban


The National Basketball Association has fined Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban $25,000 on March 29, 2009. Cuban was handed the fine on Sunday after publicly criticizing the officials after a 103-101 loss to the Denver Nuggets. Cuban became enraged when Denver's J.R. Smith came off the bench to taunt Dallas's Antoine Wright after he missed a shot near the Denver bench. 

Cuban using Twitter, the online social network, was quick to point out that you "can't say no one makes money from twitter now. the nba does." On Sunday, after learning of his latest fine Cuban once again used Twitter to point out that he "just found out got fined25k by nba.) nice".

The flamboyant Mavericks owner has been fined well over a dozen times by the NBA since taking over majority ownership of the club, with a running total nearing $2 million US. All of this seems a little excessive as most of these fines could have been averted if Cuban could only learn to keep his big mouth shut, but then again where would the outside entertainment value lie within this sport?

In a meeting of the two teams back in January, Cuban was also fined $25,000 after becoming upset when Smith threw an elbow in the direction of Wright's head but did not connect (so there is some history here between the two players and with Cuban himself). Cuban offered to match the fine and donate the money to whatever charity Smith chose, suggesting he would donated the money to a fund for Steve Moore, a former NHL player who sustained a career threatening neck injury.

Cuban has a history of donating time and money to charities, even working at a Dairy Queen after making a comment about the NBA's manager of referees, Ed T. Rush saying that he "couldn't manage a Dairy Queen." After Dairy Queen management took offense to the comments made by Cuban, he offered to work at the Dairy Queen in Coppell, Texas for a day, serving ice cream to a number of fans who lined the streets to get a blizzard made by the Mavericks owner back in 2002.

Cuban, a billionaire entrepreneur, is also the Chairman of HDNet, and co-owner of 2929 Entertainment. The Mavericks owner has made his money through a number of other online business ventures over the years, and had bought a majority stake in the team for $285 million on January 15, 2000. Cuban's ownership of the club has often been described as the ultimate fan fantasy come true as the Mavericks owner continued his trail-blazing antics after purchasing the team, as he refuses to sit in a press box to view the games but rather prefers sitting in the crowd along side fans, often donning a member of the Mavericks team jersey and cheering loudly during games.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Imagine the Raps Played in the West

Out of the 28 Games the Toronto Raptors have played against Western conference this season they have won 7. Bringing this record to 7-21...in the east our record is 16-26. Both very and I mean VERY underachieving records. When looking at who the Raps beat in the east it was:

Golden State

LA Clippers (Twice)

Houston (without McGrady)

Memphis

San Antonio

Sacramento


Lets just forget about the Spurs win, that could possibly be the best win of the year for the Raptors in the ACC.


We had the Clippers number this year but their record is also 18 - 54, and once we beat them without Baron Davis in the line-up which basically leaves them with Chris Kaman who actually believed he had ADD for years before they realised he didn't. (even started his own foundation)

We beat Houston when Trace didn't have it, a decent win and the boys really played Yao good.

Memphis and Sacramento are the scraps of the league with a combined record of 32-108...and we split the games with them

If the raps were in the west, instead of our 26 wins this season we would have 16 wins right now and sit right at the bottom with Memphis and the Kings...HOW EMBARASSING

Time to break these guys up **Bosh** let him deal with his child problems elsewear!

And lets thank god that the Raps are in the east and everyonce in awhile when we play to our potential we can win enough to be ahead of the Arenas-less Wizards.
GO RAPS GO

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Hall of Fame Worthy Names

Well this originally started as a Top 10 list bust after doing some research I stumbled across more names than I expected and well, now it's a Top 20 list. Here it is...

20. Homer Bush (MLB) - Wish he was still patrolling second base for the Jays...
19. Miroslav Satan (NHL) - Would be a lot better if he would play for the Devils one day.
18. Boof Bonser (MLB) - Who names their kid Boof, honestly?
17. Coco Crisp (MLB) - Sounds like a cereal I may have enjoyed as a child.
16. Stubby Clapp (Baseball) - Hey, he's the only Canadian to top the list!
15. Dick Butkus (NFL) - Shut up, shut up, kiss my butt, kiss my butt, go to hell. (For all you Simpson's fans out there)
14. Usain Bolt (Track)- Worlds Fastest Man. Coincidence? I think not.
13. Darko Milicic (NBA) - Yeah.. he's white.
12. Ron Tugnutt (NHL) - Actually have an hockey card signed by him which makes this even funnier.
11. Warrior (Jim Hellwig) (WWF) - Better known to WWF fans as the Ultimate Warrior. The man must have had a screw loose or something because in 1993 he legally changed his name to Warrior.
10. Milton Bradley (MLB) - Wonder if he enjoys a friendly game of "Battleship" every once and awhile?
9. Shavodrick Beaver (NCAA Football) - Unfortunate.
8. God Shammgod (Basketball) - What do you even say about this name?
7. De'Cody Fagg (NCAA Football) - Tell me this guy didn't get teased growing up.
6. Chubby Cox (NBA) - Kinda hoping for his sake that he lived up to the name on this one.
5. Urban Shocker (MLB) - Classic.
4. Rusty Kuntz (MLB) - Makes you think what his parents thinking on that one?
3. Dick Trickle (Racing) - A rather amusing bodily function.
2. Harry Colon (NFL) - Rather unfortunate.
1. Lucious Pusey (MLB) (later changed his name to Lucious Seymour) - Hmm I wonder why?



Other Notables - Albert Pujols (MLB), Dick Pole (MLB), Speedy Claxton (MLB), Rudy Gay (NBA), World B. Free (NBA), Chad Ocho Cinco (NFL), Pee Wee Reese (MLB), Dean Windass (Soccer), Misty Hyman (Swimming), "Ugly" Johnny Dickshot (MLB), Gregor Fucka (Basketball), Pete LaCock (MLB)